1. I’M GOING JURASSIC PARK ON YOU, LOSERS!!!!

    (via niknak79)

     

  2. (via niknak79)

     

  3. (via niknak79)

     

  4. OR WAR

    OR HUNGER

    OR DISEASE

    OR RACISM

    HECK EVEN JERSEY SHORE IS WAS WORSE. 

    (via niknak79)

     

  5. (via niknak79)

     

  6. ilovecharts:

    A Flowchart For Determining If A Moment Is Actually Awkward

    THIS.

    NOW EVERYONE JUST SHUT UP ABOUT “THAT (DECIDEDLY NOT) AWKWARD MOMENT”

     

  7. (via niknak79)

     

  8. ilovecharts:

    Who are you voting for?

     

  9. Amen. Preach.

    (via niknak79)

     

  10. (via niknak79)

     

  11. (via niknak79)

     

  12. Best 2 minutes you will ever spend watching someone laugh all by themselves.

     
     

  13. theatlantic:

    What If Herman Cain Had a Kill List?

    Scene: Herman Cain is grinning as he enters the Situation Room, carrying enough Godfather’s Pizza for everyone present — and to everyone’s horror, Rich Lowrie is there at his side. 

    JOHN BRENNAN: Before we begin, Mr. Cain, a question.

    CAIN: (glancing at a note card) Islom Karimov!

    BRENNAN: Huh?

    CLINTON: (amused) That’s the president of Uzbekistan. 

    BRENNAN: Jesus. 

    CAIN: I think that we ought to be able to kill 9 terrorists from 9 different countries in 9 minutes. Is there any reason we can’t do that?

    BRENNAN:That isn’t exactly how it works, Mr. Cain, we can’t —

    CAIN: Excuse me, I was talking to my man Rich. As I said during my campaign, I’m going to rely on my national security advisers, and I’m not going to let Washington insiders keep making all the decisions.  

    BRENNAN: I was just explaining that someone has gone to fetch the next batch of photos, so we have to at least wait —

    CAIN: What about that guy? Looks to me like he’s a fan of sharia law. 

    CLINTON: (texts “OMG” to Brennan).

    Read more. [Image: Reuters, Kasia Cieplak-Mayr von Baldegg]

    A one-act play of GOP fan fiction, by Conor Friedersdorf.